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Why would they like someone who, if she can still have children, would need to have them straight away?No, men will run a mile.’ She paused, then added: ‘Sorry, dear.’ I’ve never been someone who absolutely has to be in a relationship.Whenever I was between boyfriends in the past, I would just enjoy life until another man came along — through work, mutual friends or our eyes meeting across a crowded room.But when I phoned a dating agency eight months ago, everything had taken on a new sense of urgency. ‘Haven’t you found yourself a husband yet, Bridgey? But don’t look desperate — men hate that.’ I went speed-dating, online-dating, wine-tasting dating, quiz-dating and dinner-dating.He was 41, adventurous and enjoyed travelling — as do I.His emails were fun and witty and when we first met for a lunch date we left the pub at 6pm, always a good sign. My friends liked him and I couldn’t believe I’d found someone at last.
The woman, who is divorced but says she would love to be married again, describes herself as being ‘on the wrong side of 45 with a brace of kids’ and bewails her place in ‘relationship no-man’s land’, condemned to be alone for the rest of her days.
Sadly, yes, according to Dr Bernie Hogan, a research fellow at Oxford University.
He pointed me towards a research website called Ok Trends, which draws on data supplied by more than a million members of Ok Cupid, one of the biggest dating websites in the world.
‘There are many men out there who are bored with having meaningless affairs and who want to settle down and have children too,’ he says.
‘If a guy is going out with a woman in her late 30s, it is hardly going to be a surprise that she might also want children.’With that in mind, I decided to be honest about my desire for marriage and children — with surprising results.
Ruthie has been looking for a boyfriend for the past decade.